I love great newsletters! You know the ones that you’re not even tempted to click that “unsubscribe” option at the top. Nick Gray sends out a “Friends Newsletter” every month or so and shares great stories (like taking a girl on a blind date to Japan!!) and links to things he’s learning and doing.
He is the author of the 2 Hour Cocktail Party: How to Build Big Relationships with Small Gatherings, which is basically a cheat code for hosting a party without losing your sanity. If you’re new to a town, it’s an awesome way to get your network momentum rolling! Or if you have several different circles of connections, it’s a great way to introduce them to each other! Gabe, our oldest son, followed Nick’s advice and even hosted his own here in Austin a couple years ago.
Here are some tips of Nick’s best tips from the book:
1. Set a Clear Start and End Time (Then Stick to It)
Nick’s golden rule: the party is two hours, not “whenever people feel like leaving.” A defined end time lowers the barrier to saying yes and keeps the energy high. Guests relax more when they know they won’t be stuck all night—and you get your evening back.
2. Invite Fewer People Than You Think You Need
Intimate beats impressive. Instead of inviting 30 and hoping 15 show up, invite 12–18 people you genuinely want to connect—and expect most of them to come. Smaller groups lead to better conversations and less awkward standing around.
3. Be a “Connector,” Not Just a Host
Your job isn’t to entertain—it’s to introduce people thoughtfully. Nick recommends simple, specific intros like:
“You both just moved here,” or “You’re both working on startups.”
This instantly gives people common ground and saves them from small-talk purgatory. This is something our family is very passionate about. If everyone could learn to make great introductions, the world would be a better place!
4. Serve One Signature Drink (Plus Non-Alcoholic Options)
Skip the full bar. A single, pre-planned cocktail keeps things simple, affordable, and smooth. Pair it with sparkling water or a mocktail option so everyone feels included. Less decision-making for guests = more conversation.
Nick has recently been helping people build their own personal websites! If you have been wanting a place to share your ideas, products, or services online, be sure to reach out to him! He has a simple format and reasonable prices! His background includes founding Museum Hack, and he still runs Patron View, a special site that tracks contributions to the world’s top museums and cultural organizations.
Thanks, Nick for being so friendly, responsive, and such a cheerleader of people!
Sonya Dalrymple 